Zombies Revisited (2012 Style)

It's official. The SFJHS annual zombie haiku contest is back and the hordes are picking up steam (and discarded organs).  Here are my contributions as I wrote examples for my classes this year:

first period class—

perfect imitation of

mindless zombie horde

counting on fingers

reminds zombie children not

to play with their food

splitting up with your

zombie girlfriend gives a new

meaning to heartbreak

don’t mistake zombies

for wand’ring teenage trick-or-

treaters at your door

fast food zombies love

finding the surprise inside

happy meals for lunch!

some uncouth zombies

pick their teeth with fingernails

still attached to hands

civilized zombies

remember when slurping to

extend their pinkies

defense weapons? ha!

think your guns will save you from

the apocalypse?

“you think you’re scared now?”

grunted zombie at the door

“wait till I get in”

Louisville Slugger

by the nightstand for robbers?

nope. zombie attack

zombies smell the fear

and can’t wait to taste the sweat

running down your neck

writing more zombie

haiku leaves my brains empty;

at least I’m safe now

kidney. liver. spleen.

anatomy lesson? nope

zombie lunch buffet

LMFAO—

(ev’ry day I’m shuf-fl-in’)

zombies in disguise

endless hours of

console preparation just

creates more zombies

vacant expressions

while mindlessly texting help

blend with zombies

These last two came after the zombies had already relieved me of my brains.  Moan.