Contest Time!

Woo hoo! Here's a little fun that I have with my students each year when we discuss run-on sentences, the right amount of details (of which this is a non-example), or something along those lines. I first did this at a WIFYR conference the summer of 2004, and have participated on other occasions.

Rules:
1. Write the longest sentence you possibly can in five minutes.
2. It must be grammatically correct.
3. You may only use one semicolon.
4. You cannot just use a list; it must have action.

Prizes:
(I'll figure it out later. Let's just see how many respond.)

Example:
Suddenly, and without warning, the downright dastardly and inhumane mutated monster of a man, Ivan the Impossible, stoically rose from the ice covered graying sidewalk, which ran in front of the decaying, moss-covered cemetery across from the looming gothic church, where the violent shots had just barely felled his enormous figure, and menacingly cackled like a demented, wounded hyena about to claim its next victim who was not quite dead yet; disgustingly amused at his own evil, cleverly-twisted feign of death, he solidly fixed his horrid, ice cold, yellow gaze upon the ancient, black single-shot pistol still smoking in my quivering hand, and then raised his smoldering eyes, ringed with hatred and outlined with loathing, until they met mine and pierced my fearfully trembling soul, and then he methodically marched forward, trudging one stumbling step after another to claim my pitiful life without mercy and without remorse.

Deadline: April 2, 2010

Good luck, and no cheating!